Training to become our Strongest Self

Lord of Life strengthen us in Spirit, body, and soul: With our mind, heart, and will in your loving control; So we can heal our world, and make your children whole.

"Who are you training to become?" This is a phrase I have written on the squat rack in my home gym, and at the top of my training log. Because what we practice is what we become, and how we train shapes who we will be. So, who are you training to become? This entire instructional manual, which unpacks my core training principles, is an attempt to help us all train in such a way that we become who and what we want to be: That we train to become our strongest self, our wisest self, our best self.

So, since this blog is a summary of my entire training program, we need to start by defining "training". Depending on where you look, you can find many definitions for training. Training can refer to "developing a particular skill or type of behavior through practice and instruction". In a purely physical sense training often refers to "preparing oneself through diet and exercise in order to be fit". Or in its most general sense, training can be "to grow in a particular direction or into a required shape". All of these overlapping definitions share my idea of training: Training is "activity with intensity directed toward a purpose". 

A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

Recently a good friend of mine asked me a great question. He is a person of considerable spiritual depth and commitment to Christ, yet he has never been part of Evangelicalism. And he asked: 

What do [Evangelicals] mean by accepting Jesus as one’s “personal” Lord? Or having a “personal” relationship with Jesus? Like do they mean some sort of "warming-of-the-heart" kind of experience? Or is it some rejection of [the idea that Christ must be] mediated through the Church as an institution?

As someone who came to faith in Christ in the Evangelical world of the early 1990's, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt I have a "personal relationship with Christ" which began when I "accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior". I have a definite time when Jesus became real to me, and I can pinpoint when I prayed a "sinner's prayer" to receive Jesus. And I have "witnessed" to thousands of people the lifesaving power of Jesus, known in his death and resurrection. I have shared the "four spiritual laws". I have asked people "who is on the throne" of their life. So, I began my response as follows:

The Way of Christ is Progress

Recently, as people on social media are wont to do, a long time friend of mine posted a really reductionistic meme about the "unchanging" nature of the Way of Christ. It said: 

"Christianity does not 'progress' with the times. If it did, it would be a false religion. Do not be deceived into thinking there is a progressive form of Christianity. It doesn't exist because the truth never changes. Jesus is the same yesterday today and forever. Amen"

I used to fear change and progress, and I was also committed to a really simplistic and reductive understanding of the Church as "the pillar and foundation of the truth" (cf. 1Timothy 3.15).

Two kinds of Mystical Experience: Ecstasy and Emphasis

Let all that you do be done in love. (1 Corinthians 16:14)

There are at least two kinds of mystical experience of God: Ecstasy and Emphasis. Ecstasy is to take you out of yourself. The Greek word "ekstasis" literally means to stand ("stasis") outside ("ek") of oneself. Ecstasy is to experience self-transcendence, and often to have some kind of visionary experience that is utterly unlike everyday life. Perhaps a luminous Divine Darkness that envelops us, or a Divine Light which is infinitely brighter than our normal sight, or a vivid sense of the Personal Presence of God. In Ecstasy we experience rapturous personal union with God in Love on a separate plane of Reality than the normal and mundane plane of existence we are accustomed to. And that transcendent experience is often interpreted through symbols we know and understand, such as the "seeing" or "feeling" or "hearing" the personal presence of Jesus, or even his Mother Mary. 

The other kind of mystical experience of God is Emphasis.

My First Dark Night of the Soul

The year 2020 has been a Dark Night for so many people in many ways: Material, Spiritual, Mental, Emotional, Social. Since it is coming to an end today, I thought I would reflect on the very first time in my life of faith that I remember encountering a "Dark Night" of faith. 

All Yang no yin

Proclaim Hope and you are adored. 

Explain despair and you are ignored. 

Preach Meaning and be applauded. 

Examine meaninglessness and be criticized. 

28 Summers

28 summers ago I fell in love with Jesus

Not all at once

But a growing awareness

Starting with a desperate deal

Heal my life Jesus!

And I will live that life for you!

Little did I know what that would entail

But Jesus was faithful when I was faithless

And so unfolding over several months

This new love became real

Until one late night

On a Christmas break

At a Taco Bell

I knew I belonged to Jesus

Deep down in my gut

And it wasn’t just bean and cheese tacos talking. 

The Pentecostal Promise

When the day of Pentecost had come, the disciples were all together in one place. And suddenly from heaven there came a sound like the rush of a violent wind, and it filled the entire house where they were sitting. Divided tongues, as of fire, appeared among them, and a tongue rested on each of them. All of them were filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other languages, as the Spirit gave them ability… This is what was spoken through the prophet Joel: "In the last days it will be, God declares, that I will pour out my Spirit upon all flesh, and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy… Even upon my servants, both men and women, in those days I will pour out my Spirit, and they shall prophesy." [From Acts 2:1-21]

I have a confession to make. Perhaps the scariest holy day in the Christian calendar for me is Pentecost. It scares me because it holds within it the promise of unpredictability: The promise of a God who, at any time, could take our carefully manicured status quo, and turn it on its head. With a mighty roar, a cacophony of God's grace could overflow, and spill into the routine parts of our life.

On other holy days it is not this way. With some plausibility we can keep them outside of us. Christmas is about a holy child, born a long time ago, in a land far away. All Saints day is about holy women and men who are nice to think about, but live at several levels of remove from our daily life in 21st century America.

Even Easter, as incredible as it is, is easy to keep outside of us, to stop it from threatening us. It is about a Victory over death that happened long ago, that assures us of eternal life sometime in the future. 

To control people, control their stories

"Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." (Romans 12.2)

To control a population, control their imagination of what is possible. Because people will not even attempt what they think is impossible.

To control their imagination, control the stories they hear and the stories they tell. Because stories paint pictures of identity and possibility which go beyond our everyday experience into what could be. So only allow stories to be told which frame what is possible in a way that is most beneficial to those who want to maintain power.

Live Wire

All of them were taken into ecstasy and they glorified God. Indeed they were awestruck and kept saying “we have seen strange signs today!” (Luke 5.26, my translation)

Nobody told me there'd be days like these. Strange days indeed! Most peculiar, Mama. Whoa! (John Lennon)

We often treat spirituality like a banking transaction: Rational, calculated, with a clear cost-benefit analysis, and no hidden variables. But perhaps spirituality is more like the electric current that gives power to our passion, which we try to contain within neatly organized power cables labeled “religion” and “morality” and “ritual” and “devotion” and “belief”. 

But every now and then, when we reach deep inside ourselves, we grab ahold of a cable that has not been insulated with respectability and predictability and social acceptability. It is then that we get a great shock, and we feel the power of the Divine surge through our whole being, lighting us up from the inside: A surge of passion that pushes us beyond our ability to comprehend our life, and pretend that everything is “normal”. 

We are awestruck with the unpredictable wonder and messy beauty of the world just long enough get outside of our own heads for a moment. And that moment of transcendence, that millisecond of grasping the breadth and depth of infinite Love, is powerful enough to fuel our passion for years to come. May we all rip open the fuse box of our soul every now and then and embrace the Divine power within us.

If there ever was someone inclined toward seeing spirituality in purely rational, calculated terms, it would be the co-founder of calculus and probability theory, Blaise Pascal. Pascal was not only a famous mathematician, but also a famous defender of the Christian faith, who wrote at length about the most rational way to defend and uphold the Christian faith. And yet, his most powerful spiritual insights came when he reached deep inside and grasped the Live Wire of God's presence within him. The experience was so powerful that he wrote it down in poetry, and had it sewn into his jacket by his heart. His Live Wire experience reads thus:

The year of grace 1654, Monday, 23 November... From about half past ten at night until about half past midnight.

FIRE.

GOD of Abraham, GOD of Isaac, GOD of Jacob
not of the philosophers and of the learned.
Certitude. Certitude. Feeling. Joy. Peace.
GOD of Jesus Christ.
My God and your God.
Your GOD will be my God.
Forgetfulness of the world and of everything, except GOD.
He is only found by the ways taught in the Gospel.
Grandeur of the human soul.
Righteous Father, the world has not known you, but I have known you.
Joy, joy, joy, tears of joy.
I have departed from him:
They have forsaken me, the fount of living water.
My God, will you leave me?
Let me not be separated from him forever.
This is eternal life, that they know you, the one true God, and the one that you sent, Jesus Christ.
Jesus Christ.
Jesus Christ.
I left him; I fled him, renounced, crucified.
Let me never be separated from him.
He is only kept securely by the ways taught in the Gospel:
Renunciation, total and sweet.
Complete submission to Jesus Christ and to my director.
Eternally in joy for a day’s exercise on the earth.

May I not forget your words. Amen.

On the Nature of Sainthood

What makes someone a “saint” as opposed to someone who is just popular and persuasive and affable? What makes someone genuinely deep rather than merely fashionable? What makes a person inwardly spiritual rather than outwardly religious?

Wondervoyage: The Antidote to Affluenza

As a host of media pundits and cultural critics have noted over the past several years, many of today’s young adults suffer from a debilitating illness that can cause severe apathy, lethargy, and short-sightedness, along with a profound feeling that the entire world is actually orbiting around them. What is this dread malady? Affluenza. This disease can afflict many who have grown up with access to quality education, convenience, and comfort, but have been relatively insulated from people of other viewpoints, cultures, and socio-economic backgrounds.

My Moses Year Begins

Moses wonders what he has gotten himself into, and if there is a return policy on stone tablets.

Today marks my entrance into the "Moses year": 40 years of journeying through the wilderness that is human existence. Although I can quickly count a dozen things I really should be doing instead of this, I think I would be remiss to let this day pass without some written reflection.

The Perfectly Imperfect Journey

"Although Christ was in the form of God, he did not regard equality with God as something to be held onto, but emptied himself, taking the form of a servant..." [Philippians 2:6-7]

The perfect journey. The perfect meal. The perfect destination. We throw the word "perfect" around a great deal to signify our search for something or someone that is without flaw, without taint, without regret. At the very heart of human existence is a yearning for a transcendent experience or relationship that will somehow complete us and leave us without yearning or need. One of the reasons why we journey, in fact, is to seek such an experience. We want to leave the mundane, imperfect world we inhabit and find somewhere that is, well, perfect.

But what we often find is that our journeys are not perfect.

Why Biblical Christians need Biological Evolution

Over the last few years in educational ministry, I have continually had questions asked about, discussions over, and even debates because of the topic evolution and faith. Can one believe in the Bible AND in evolution? Is it possible for a faithful Christian to have an evolutionary worldview? And even if it is possible, is it permissible within the limits of classic Christian orthodoxy? And after all of this, I think it is finally time to move beyond asking whether it is merely permissible for faithful, Biblical, Christ-loving Christians to have an evolutionary view of how God is at work in creation.

Biblical Christians need to think in evolutionary terms to be faithful to Christ.

My theological history

When I get in discussions and debates with people, they often call me by a label that I think is completely off base.  Fundamentalists call me liberal.  Liberals have called me a fundamentalist.  Other times I get called a Catholic or an "Emerging Church" person.  So what am I?

I am like you.  I am embodied: I have a limited view of the world around me that is partially formed by my maleness, and I am a finite creation that has a hard time being "objective" about anything.  I am en-cultured: a product of a late 20th century Western consumerism that puts a whole lot of emphasis on personal choice and freedom, and still has a lot of hangovers from Post-Enlightenment modernism.  I am en-languaged: I have a way of thinking about things formed by speaking English, and reading Greek, Hebrew, and a smattering of Latin.  I am en-traditioned: I have come to view God and the world around me from certain traditions, namely the Evangelical, Pentecostal, and Anglican Traditions.  I am en-ritualed: I have certain rituals that I have developed and taken on myself from others that help me relate to my spouse, my child, my congregation, my friends, and my God.

Will Nate ever go Catholic?

A friend of a friend named Matt (check his blog here) sent me an email after reading my blog the other day. In it, he asked me a rather blunt question, but one worth answering and sharing with y'all:

"Can I ask you a question? Have you ever considered becoming Catholic?"

Given all the stuff I write on this blog in favor of Catholicism and Orthodoxy, I felt I needed to answer this publicly and not just privately. Here it goes:

SHORT ANSWER: Yes. I have considered becoming Catholic with a big "C" (i.e. Roman Catholic). I already consider myself catholic with a small "c".

LONG ANSWER: We have all seen Church "family trees" in our Church history classes. Usually the denomination / sect / tradition that you are (and I say this for any denomination) in winds up being the middle of the chart, and all other forms of Christianity are seen as deviations to the right or left, if not fallen off entirely. This makes your particular denomination the "truest" expression of the Church, the norm to judge all others.

Form, Deform, Reform, Conform, Inform, Transform

My friend Brett has posted an article about spiritual growth and being "conformed" to Christ. It is posted here. There is a rich, rich symbolism behind the word "form" which his article revolves around. So, here are some things that begin to swirl in my head about "form", as in formation, conformed, transformation, etc.

Let us begin with the word "form". Form has been a big word in Christian Theology from its inception (indeed, since Plato in 500 BC) until we began to give up on beliefs in universals in the late middle ages and the reformation. Now we do not talk about "forms" as much because we tend to take it for granted that there cannot be forms or archetypes which exist as the metaphysical basis for reality as we know it. To put it another way, we have given up faith in universals and only believe in particulars these days. Yet, for the great theologians before the rise of nominalism in the 1300's, knowing something's "form" (i.e. universal nature and purpose) was essential to knowing what it was. Then came Nominalism, which is in part, a belief that universals are not real entities, but merely names- nomina- that we give to general sets of traits. Nominalism is just one of a scad of deconstructive philosophies and theologies throughout the centuries that deny the unity and purpose of the universe in big and small ways.

So this priest and two monks walk into a delivery room...

The following article is a re-publication of an essay on fatherhood I posted to my daughter's website. The website is defunct, but my daughter is not... and this essay was too good to leave on my harddrive for no one to read...

This is a story about fatherhood for guys who aren't real emotional and who are completely out of touch with their "feminine side". Let me start this off by saying that I am not a touchy-feely kind of guy. I am humorous. I am passionate. I am intense. But touchy-feely... not so much. I don't cry at weddings or funerals... or very much at all for that matter. I don't watch chick flicks unless my wife makes me. And I am not even empathetic about most injuries. I am from the "no blood, no bones broken, no problem" school of thinking.

Are we there yet?

We've all been there. It's the big yearly mission trip to (fill in the blank), and you have been driving the 15 passenger van for about 10 hours, and you have the annoying kid (God love him) in the back yelling "are we there yet"? Your rear end is stuck to the seat in a pool of sweat. You have listened to the same Christian CD five times in a row. And this kid keeps asking "are we there yet"? You tell him to shut up and chill out over and over (in the kindest way you can), but every half hour or so, he asks "are we there yet"?

I learned from a youth ministry friend of mine the perfect response (which she, in turn, learned from her youth minister). Just say "Five minutes… we only have five more minutes" every time they ask, no matter how long or how short the time is. Pretty soon they get frustrated, and then give up, and learn to enjoy the ride. You know, upon further reflection, I think that is what God has been saying to me lately too: "Five minutes Nate, we only have five more minutes". He keeps saying it until I shut up, chill out, and learn to enjoy the ride.